Bird Puns & Jokes: 45+ Best That Will Chirp You Into A Smile

Hey there, here you’ll find the best, most funny bird puns and something so weird you won’t believe it’s true. I did my best to bring you only the best bird humor. Please share this page to social media or link to it from your blog if you end up liking it because that would help me publish more awesome stuff for you and everyone else.

This page has more than just a list of short puns from many sources. It also features other types of bird jokes. Some of them are corny. But none of them are dirty. The majority of these jokes about birds are totally awesome and clean, perfect both for kids and adults. Plus, this page has many photos of beautiful birds and awesome bonus content you’ll definitely enjoy.

Before I tell you the jokes and share with you bonus content, how about a few fun facts about birds? So did you know that scientists consider birds to be the only living dinosaurs? As a matter of fact, the closest living relative of a huge and terrifying dinosaur Tyrannosaurus Rex is a friendly chicken. So when you’re eating chicken, you’re eating a dinosaur’s relative and that relative would very pissed off if he found out.

Also, each day, an average bird eats twice its weight in food. So when the people say “eats like a bird” about someone, they have no idea what they’re talking about. Even a person with a serious eating disorder doesn’t eat like a bird, unless he wants to die from overeating. And did you know that a mockingbird can imitate sounds, making it possible for you to blame them for your own farts?

Either way, you’ve come to the right place because these animals birds have never been funnier than here on Numerous bird one liners below prove that.

Bird Puns

black and yellow bird on branch

Enjoy this amusing bird play on words and please read until the end because that’s where the best funnies are.

  1. What do you call a bird who doesn’t spit? Swallow.
  2. Why did the big bird feel left out? He was ostrich-sized.
  3. What do you call a law abiding eagle? Legal.
  4. What bird roasts you? Mockingbird.
  5. All the birds were getting ready for the royal ceremony. They had packed their bags to leave for Duckingham Palace.
  6. When will Ryan Gosling be old enough to be called Ryan Goose? If you like this bird pun, you’ll definitely like these witty goose puns.
  7. What do you call a religious eagle? A bird of pray.
  8. What do you call a bird who doesn’t know any song lyrics? Hummingbird.
  9. Have some swallows for dinner. They’ll make your meal more digestible.
  10. Did you know that it’s wrong to breed eels with eagles? It’s eel-eagle.
bird pun about eagles
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If you like these funny bird puns you’ve just read, you’ll also like these very best cow puns because they’ll put a smile on your beautiful face.

Cute Bird Puns

cute yellow bird on Sakura tree
If you think this yellow bird looks cute, please share its cuteness with your followers on Pinterest or other site.

These puns are both cute and witty. You’ll definitely like them if you like cuteness in all its wonderful forms.

  1. What’s a bird’s favorite Beatles song? Owl you need is love.
  2. How do birds on a wire start a relationship? They meet online.
  3. What’s the dance a goose loves to do when it’s jubilant? The goose loves to tangoose.
  4. What do you call an eagle who can play the piano? Talonted.
  5. Why was the owl in love? It found its owl love nest. If you like this cute pun, I’m sure that you’ll also like these awesome owl puns.
  6. Did you hear about the duck who thought he was a squirrel? That was one tough nut to quack.
  7. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
close up of a yellow and blue macaw parrot
If you like this macaw parrot, please share this photo to Pinterest right now because your followers will like it too.

If you like these cute bird puns you’ve just read, please have fun with these totally awesome parrot puns right now because you’ll like them too.

Bird Pun Names

That would be amusing to have a bird with one of these funny pun names. But please have some pity on your bird and don’t give it one of these names because your bird would be seriously pissed off.

  1. Magoo
  2. Squeaky
  3. Waddles
  4. Wingding
  5. Birdbrain
  6. Colin Fowl
  7. Ace Hentura
  8. Henona Ryder
  9. Hillary Puff
  10. Smarty Pants
  11. Feather Graham
  12. Wedding Singer
  13. Crowy Deschanel
  14. Albatross Geller
  15. Henzel Washington

Best Bird Puns

water birds ducks flying during daytime

These are the best puns about birds you’ll find anywhere. Plus, most of them are perfect for Instagram captions. Please share this page on social media if you like them because it’s good to share witty humor.

  1. What bird is the cleanest? Dove.
  2. Pelicans usually get kicked out of the restaurants. Everyone at the restaurant says it’s because of their very big bills.
  3. Why did the chicken go through the PowerPoint presentation? To get to the other slide.
  4. Where do crows go for a drink? A crowbar.
  5. If a bird shows aikido skills, it should be called Steven Seagull.
  6. If you teach a goose to use a computer, is it a technical fowl?
  7. A scientist wanted the day to go faster, so he tied a clock to a messenger pigeon. Time flew.
  8. The pet shop did very well when they started selling parrots. They literally flew off the shelves.
parrot pun related to pet shop
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Bird Jokes

blue and red bird during daytime
  1. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
  2. What do you call it when a bird moves things with it’s mind? Pelikinesis.
  3. What bird doesn’t need a comb? Bald eagle.
  4. I’ve bought a bag of bird seeds about three months ago. Anyone know how long it takes for the bird to grow?
  5. The zoo banned me because I’ve killed two birds with one stone.
bird joke about zoo
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Bird Dad Jokes

hummingbird in midair
This hummingbird photo will look good on one of your Pinterest boards.

These dad jokes about birds are so bad they’re kinda funny in a corny way.

  1. Why was the dad bird annoyed with his lazy chick? It wouldn’t leave the nest.
  2. What bird carries the most weight? Crane.
  3. What do you call an over-caffeinated turkey? A perky turkey.
  4. What’s the difference between a fly and an eagle? An eagle can fly but a fly cannot eagle.

Best Bird Jokes

blue and green bird on the tree branch
  1. Why are ducks so good at fixing things? Because they’re great at using duck-tape.
  2. What do you call a rude turkey? Jerk-ey.
  3. What’s the opposite of a flamingo? Flamin-stop.
  4. Three guys were walking down the street. Two of them walked into a bar. The third guy ducked.
  5. The man says to a psychotherapist: “I keep seeing a dead bird in my dreams. Does that mean I’m suicidal?” The psychotherapist replies: “I also keep seeing a dead bird in my dreams. In my case, that means I’m attracted to dead birds. That’s why I became a psychotherapist.” I, Roman Marshanski, wrote this bird joke. If you like it, please finish reading this page and follow me on Twitter at the link below.
  6. Mick Jagger and Keith Richards were cruising down the coast. Coming around a bend, they saw a magnificent bald eagle in the middle of the road. Mick swerved to save its life but lost control of the car. So they plummeted off a cliff to their death. That’s how two stones were killed with one bird.
brown and orange bird on the tree branch

If you like funny bird jokes you’ve read on this page, please check out these very best penguin jokes that will make you laugh.

Awesome Bird Video

I’m sure you’ll like this bonus content video about birds because it’s awesome.

Please watch this bird video right now because it’s pretty amusing. So play it right now.

Best Bird Memes From Reddit

These are the best Reddit memes about birds. I’m sure you’ll agree with me that they are the best because only the select few made the cut.

  1. The meme below is the best YouTube parody meme I’ve ever seen. It’s ridiculous enough to be hilarious.
  1. The next meme is more relatable, but it’s equally ridiculous as the first one. It’s about one of those dating situations because birds have the same relationship with dating as some of us humans.
  1. The meme below is one of the best examples of absurdist humor I ever saw on Reddit. Birds have never been more energetic and more absurd than this one. Apparently, it decided to live in some kind of weidly fast lane.

Bird Puns From Reddit

  1. Never try to annoy someone with bird puns because toucan play at that game.
  2. That joke flew right over my head.
  3. What’s a bird’s favorite drink? Nestle.
  4. You sound like a raven lunatic.
  5. You’ve committed a cardinal sin.

Do you like the bird puns you’ve read on this page? If yes, please share this page with all your friends on social media right now because it’s good to share witty humor.

flying blue and green hummingbird

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Related Links

  1. Wikipedia
  2. Ponly
  3. Kidadl
  4. Reddit
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