School Jokes: 35 Best Funny Jokes That Will Make You Smile
Check out my collection of funny school jokes right now. I’m sure they’ll make you smile with joy.
Most of the jokes you’ll find on this page are perfectly clean, appropriate school jokes for kids. However, a few of these jokes are somewhat dirty and inappropriate. This said, all of these jokes are awesome. So I think that most of these funny one liner jokes are perfect both for adults and kids. In short, you’ve come to the right place. School has never been funnier than here on Humoropedia.com.
Table Of Contents
The Editor’s Favorite School Joke
Teacher received the following letter from one of her students’ parents: “Harry is sorry he didn’t do his homework last night. He will never do it again.”
11 High School Jokes
- Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
- What did Sir Mix-A-Lot say in high school? Baby Got Backpack.
- What’s a bus you can never enter? A syllabus.
- Why didn’t the teenager go to the pirate movie? Because it was rated arrrrr. If you like this high school joke, you’ll also like these pirate jokes and puns.
- Why was the geometry book sad? Because it had too many problems. If you like this joke, you’ll also like these geometry jokes and puns.
- Why did the freshman eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.
- Why did the period tell the comma to stop? It was the end of the sentence.
- What does a school and plant have in common? STEM.
- Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because it has a silent pee. If you think this joke is funny, you’ll enjoy these really funny corny jokes.
- What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
- Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.
If you like these high school jokes, please continue reading this page because there are more awesome jokes below.
5 Back To School Jokes
- Why do calculators make great friends? You can always count on them.
- What school requires you to drop out in order to graduate? Sky diving school.
- Why didn’t the fish go on vacation? Because he was always in school.
- What dinosaur had the best vocabulary? The thesaurus.
- How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.
If you like these back to school jokes, you’ll also like these really funny clean jokes and puns.
11 Clean School Jokes
These are some of the best clean school jokes you’ll ever read. So I’m sure you’ll like them.
- Why was the music teacher not able to open his classroom? Because his keys were on the piano.
- Why doesn’t the sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
- Teacher: ‘How can we keep the school clean?’ Student: ‘By staying at home.’
- Teacher: ‘Why are you talking during my lesson?’ Student: ‘Why are you teaching during my conversation?’
- What happened to the plant in math class? It grew square roots. If you like this clean school joke, you’ll also like these really funny plant jokes.
- Why did the student throw his watch out of the school window? He wanted to see time fly.
- Why did the student take a ladder to school? He was going to high school.
8. A Teacher was once giving a big test. Upon collecting the tests she noticed a note attached to the test with a $100 bill underneath, “one dollar per point please” the note said.
9. Son: “My math teacher is crazy”. Mother: “Why?” Son: “Yesterday she told us that five is 4+1; today she is telling us that five is 3 + 2.”
10. How do bees get to school? By school buzz.
11. As a 7th grade biology teacher, I was teaching my class about the flow of blood in the body. After my lecture I asked the class the following: “Why is it that if I would turn upside down, my face would turn red since the blood would flow to my head, but when I stand upright my feet don’t turn red?” I was taken aback when a boy blurted out: “That’s cuz your feet ain’t empty!”
Funny School Jokes
I think you’re gonna like these funny school jokes you’re about to read. Please share this page if you like them.
- What did the calculator say to the other calculator? “You can count on me.”
- A father who is very much concerned about his son’s bad grades in math decides to register him at a catholic school. After his first term there, the son brings home his report card: He’s getting “A”s in math. The father is, of course, pleased, but wants to know: “Why are your math grades suddenly so good?” “You know”, the son explains, “when I walked into the classroom the first day, and I saw that guy on the wall nailed to a plus sign, I knew one thing: This place means business.”
- In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, “Only take one. God is watching.” Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”
- The teacher asks, “Flora, what part of the human body increases ten times when excited?” Flora blushes and says, “That’s disgusting, I won’t even answer that question.” The teacher calls on Johnny: “What part of the human body increases ten times when excited?” “That’s easy,” says Johnny. “It’s the pupil of the eye.” “Very good, Johnny,” responds the teacher. “That’s correct.” She then turns to Flora and says, “First, you didn’t do your homework. Second, you have a dirty mind. And third, you’re in for a BIG disappointment.”
Clean School Joke About The Invigilator
At the start of the exam, the invigilator says, “You have exactly 2 hours. I will not accept any papers after this time has elapsed.”
Two hours later, the invigilator calls out, “Time’s up, Ladies and Gentlemen.”
One student is still scribbling away ten minutes later when the invigilator has all the collected papers in a large stack front of him. Slowly, the student finishes up and walks over to hand in his paper, but the invigilator refuses to accept it. The student puffs up his chest and says:
“Do you have any idea who I am?”
“No,” says the invigilator.
“Great,” says the student as he slips his paper into the middle of the stack.
Female College Student Joke
A student comes to a young professor’s office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly. “I would do anything to pass this exam.” She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. “I mean…” she whispers, ” I would do…anything.” He returns her gaze. “Anything?” He asks. She replies: “Anything.” He says: “Will you study?”
Hilarious School Jokes
One of these school jokes below is inappropriate and somewhat dirty, but it’s funny.
1. Teacher: “Why are you late?” Little Johnny: “Because of the sign.” Teacher: “What sign?” Little Johnny: “The one that says, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow.'”
2. The bell rang for school to start and Johnny walked in late. Mr. Clark asked, “Johnny, why are you late?” He replied, “I was on Cherry Hill.” Then he sat down.
Ten minutes later Nathan walked in late and Mr. Clark repeated, “Why are you late?” Nathan answered, “I was on top of Cherry Hill.”
Five minutes later Kevin walked in late and Mr. Clark said to him, “Kevin, where have you been?” Kevin replied, “I was on Cherry Hill.”
Ten minutes later a girl walked in the classroom and Mr. Clark asked, “Hi there, what’s your name?” The girl replied, “Cherry Hill.”
3. Johnny was at school and the teacher said, “Someone use fascinate in a sentence.”
Sally answered, “The zoo was fascinating.” The teacher said, “Sorry, Sally, I said to use fascinate in a sentence.”
Maria suggested, “I was fascinated at the zoo.” Once again the teacher said, “No, Maria, I specifically said to use fascinate in a sentence.”
Johnny said, “My sister has ten buttons on her sweater.” Again the teacher said, “Sorry, Johnny, I said use fascinate in a sentence.” Johnny replied, “I know, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight.”
Liked these funny school jokes? Then why not share them with your friends? They would thank you.
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