Republicans Angry Corporate Tax Breaks Are So Little

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You may have heard of a recent move by Treasury Department and Obama to curb corporate tax evasion. They are trying to prevent American companies from moving overseas and then pretending to be foreign companies. On paper it sounded like these companies were doing a good thing though. Maybe that’s why the Republicans are angry. Indeed, what else Republicans can do but help fellow rich men?

Republicans publicly demanded corporations be allowed to avoid taxes as much as they want, no matter how unethically. Here is what John Boehner, the clown of Republican Party, said:

I, John Boehner, the clown of world’s most retarded party, demand they let our evil buddies off the hook. I also demand Obama follows our example and stops doing his job. If he doesn’t stop doing his job, I would file a second lawsuit. This time it would have even less substance. But it would have a higher chance of impeaching Obama, for a secret reason.

Then John Boehner apparently thought the camera stopped rolling, but it did not: here is what the whole wide world got to hear:

That’s all BS, just like every other word I said in my whole shitty life. That second lawsuit I may file would definitely have zero chance of going anywhere. Well, at least the rich corporate bastards would give me some cash. At least I get an opportunity to harm the poor though. I hate the poor people! Ha-ha! I hope I get more opportunities to destroy their miserable lives! Ha-ha! I’m an evil motherfucker!

After he realized he was on-camera, he said:

Well, that’s a joke. Ain’t it funny? Ain’t I got a sense of humor?

Apparently no, mister Boehner. Apparently, the American public don’t think you got any sense of humor at all. They apparently think you, Mister Boehner, suck worse than anyone else.

Indeed, after that speech above, Boehner’s approval ratings dropped from 2.5% to -78.7%. This makes him the first American politician ever to have approval ratings below zero. This happened because every illegal expressed his willingness to leave the country because of Boehner’s poor job performance.

Obama said he is buys raising funds, so please don’t bother him. His wife supported him on this one, and all the ladies congratulated her on being behind her husband.

Fox News reported this development under a headline “John Boehner’s Heroic Efforts To Save The American Middle-Class”.

American oil corporations complained that they are not getting enough subsidies, so how are they poor little creatures are supposed to rob the American public? Indeed, they are such poor little creatures: they and their corporate friends are getting only 6,000$ a year from each American family.

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Roman Marshanski
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