17 Best Potato Jokes & Puns So Funny You’ll Definitely LOL

Check out this awesome collection of funny potato jokes now because they’re the best.

Some of the potato puns below are corny, but none of them are dirty. All of them are clean and perfect both for kids and adults. In short, these vegetable jokes about potatoes are simply awesome for any family member.

The Editor’s Favorite Potato Pun

How did the hipster burn his tongue? He ate potatoes before they were cool.

One Of The Best Potato Jokes Ever

Farmer greets Joseph Stalin at his Potato Farm and says: “Comrade Stalin, we have so many potatoes that, piled one on top of the other, they would reach all the way to God.” Stalin replies: “God doesn’t exist.” The farmer then says: “Exactly. Neither do the potatoes.”

If you think that the potato joke you’ve just read is funny, please check out these Russian jokes now because you’ll like them.

Funny Video

Watch this video now because it’s amusing and less than one minute long. Have a good laugh.

11 Funny Potato Puns

Brown Potatoes
  1. Why didn’t the potato chips believe anything the sandwich said? Because the sandwich was full of baloney.
  2. What do you say when someone tells you French fries are cooked in France? You say: “No, they’re not, they’re cooked in Greece.”
  3. How did the Irish potato become bilingual? He became a French fry.
  4. What do you call a skateboarding potato that’s careful with money? Chipskate.
  5. What do you call potatoes that have gone over to the dark side? Vader Tots. If you like this potato pun, you’ll also like these Star Wars jokes.
  6. Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
  7. What’s a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
  8. Why can’t a farmer keep secrets on her farm? The corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beans stalk.
  9. What’s a potato’s favorite song to dance to at a Halloween party? The Monster Mash.
  10. What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
  11. Why did the potato salad blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Funny Potato Joke About Salad Dressing
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If you like these funny potato puns, you’ll also like these awesome tomato puns.

Blonde & Potatoes

Blonde, redhead, and brunette are all on the run from the cops. They find an abandoned potato factory and each hide in a huge brown sack. The cops arrive and kick the first sack. The redhead yells “Woof! Woof!” to imitate a dog. The police captain says: “Leave it be. We don’t need some dog out here biting our ankles.” Then a cop kicks the second sack and the brunette exclaims “Meow!” The police captain says: “Leave it be. I don’t want some cat out here scratching our faces.” A cop kicks the last sack and the blonde exclaims: “Potatoes!”

3 Funny Potato Jokes

  1. What do you call a fake potato? An imi-tater.
  2. An young man comes to the doctor’s office and says he’s feeling bad. He has a carrot sticking out of one ear and a potato sticking out of his other ear. The doctor says: “I know what’s wrong with you. You’re not eating properly.”
  3. Waitress: “How did you find your steak tonight?” Customer: “I looked next to my potatoes and there it was.”

If you’ve enjoyed these funny potato jokes, you’ll also enjoy these hilarious broccoli jokes, so please check ’em out right now.

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Roman Marshanski
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