Hollywood Jokes

What Hollywood Does: Turns Novels Into Shit

If you are angry stupid executive – oops. we meant studio, not stupid…

 

What is Hollywood?

Hollywood is the city where you can spend your whole life making one movie.

Religious Jokes: Only The Best

 

How the people in Hollywood are like?

In Hollywood, every waiter is a successful actor, every bartender is a famous film producer, and the vast majority of homeless people are less fortunate relatives of Steven Spielberg.

 

Hollywood Jargon

“I met a Hollywood Heavyweight”: I got beat up by a Hollywood bum who is morbidly obese.
“We had meeting with Steven Spielberg”: The bodyguards of Steven Spielberg threw us out of his office.
“Arnold Schwarzenegger is attached”: We were able to film Arnold Schwarzenegger, while running away from him.
“We are making an 80$ million dollar movie”: We want to make an 80$ million dollar movie, but so far we have collected only 45 cents.
“We had a lot of interest”: We showed our script to everyone we could, but nobody showed any interest.
“Leonardo Di Caprio has shown an interest in our project”: Leonardo Di Caprio thinks our project is a piece of shit.
“My brother got a big part”: My brother got the part of a big guy in the *ucking Supersluts 3.
“I dated that actress before she hit it big”: I stared at her breasts but could never ask her out.
“I will read your script”: I will read your script in five years, if you are still alive.
“I went to prestigious film school”: I am depressed I spent so much money.

 

Hollywood – Featured Funny Celebrity Video

 

Want more funny stuff about Hollywood?
Check out 7 Funniest Golden Globe Moments

 

Roman Marshanski
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