50+ Really Funny Helen Keller Jokes
Laugh like a maniac with these really funny Helen Keller Jokes. They’re the best you’ll find.
While they may seem offensive, please do know that this website respects this famous woman. It also respects all of the wonderful quotes attributed to her. So some of the most offensive jokes were deleted.
The bottom line is that these jokes are not perfectly clean. So if you want clean humor, you can check out 25 Really Funny Clean Jokes You Need To Know Now.
Oh, and one more thing before you started reading these jokes. This joke list is long. So please bookmark this page right now.
- Why was Helen Keller late for school? DUI
- What is Helen Kellers favorite color? Black
- Why cant Helen Keller drive a car? Shes a woman.
- How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date!
- How come Helen Keller cant have kids? Because shes dead!
- Whats this (slowly waving fingers)? Helen Keller moaning
- Why was Helen Kellers leg wet? Her dog was blind too.
- What did Helen Keller name her dog? Nymphdrumpherlmf.
- What is Helen Kellers favorite mouthwash? Jergens lotion.
- What is Helen Kellers favorite Convenience Store? WAAAWAAA
- What did Helen Kellers room look like? She didnt know either
- What was Helen Kellers favorite childhood game? Musical chairs.
- What did Helen Keller say to the shop assistant when she knocked over a product-display in the store? Just looking!
- Why did Helen Kellers last relationship not work? Her boyfriend complained about how she never listened to his problems.
- Have you seen a picture of Helen Kellers dad? Neither has she!
- If Helen Keller fell down in the woods, would she make a sound?
- How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? Break her fingers
- If Helen Keller were psychic, would she call it a fourth sense?
- Why does Helen Keller wear tight jeans? So people can read her lips
- Why does Helen Keller wear skin-tight pants? So you can read her lips
- How did Helen Keller drive herself crazy? Trying to read a stucco wall
- Whats the name of Helen Kellers favorite book? Around the Block in 80 Days
- Why did Helen Keller cross the road? What, like she knows where shes going!
- Why didnt Helen Keller change her babys diaper? So she could always find him
- How does Helen Keller drive? One hand on the wheel and one hand on the road!
- What do you call Stevie Wonder and Helen Keller playing tennis? Eternal love.
- What did Helen Kellers parents do to punish her? Put saran wrap on the toilet
- Why is it okay to tell Helen Keller jokes? Because she cant hear them anyway!
- How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They stuck a plunger in the toilet.
- Whats Helen Kellers excuse every time she loses a competition? She couldnt see
- Have you heard of the new Helen Keller doll? Wind it up and it walks into walls
- Did you know that Helen Keller had a dollhouse in the backyard? Neither did she.
- Remember the Helen Keller doll? Youd wind her up and watch her walk into walls.
- How did Helen Keller drive her car? One hand on the wheel, the other on the road
- Where do Helen Kellers parents have her go when theres company over? Disneyworld
- How do you mess with Helen Keller? Give her a basketball and tell her to read it
- How many kids did Helen Keller have? NONE! The plunger went all the way through!
- How can you tell if Helen Keller has brushed her teeth? By the Gleam in her eye.
- Why couldnt Helen Keller play on her high school football team? Because shes a girl
- How do you tell if Helen Keller is alive? If you hear something fall down the stairs
- What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie wonder? Endless love
- Why did Helen Kellers dog commit suicide? You would too if your name was Urghrrghrghr
- Why does Helen Keller play the piano with one hand? Because she sings with the other!
- How did Helen Keller drive a car? With one hand on the wheel, and one hand on the road.
- How come Helen Keller didnt scream when she fell off the cliff? She was wearing mittens
- How did Helen Keller break her arm while in the car? Trying to read a stop sign going 80
- What did Helen Kellers parents do to punish her for swearing? Washed her hands with soap.
- Why does Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand? She uses the other to sing with.
- How did Helen Kellers teachers punish her for talking in class? They made her wear mittens
- Why did Helen Kellers dog kill itself? You would too if your name was sajifjlsisdjifiuopoo
- What did Helen Keller scream when she fell off the mountain? Nothing, she was wearing mittens.
- Why did Helen Keller have yellow fingers? From whispering sweet-nothings in her boyfriends ear
- Did you hear about the new Helen Keller Doll? You wind her up and she bumps into the furniture!
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