Why You Should Expect Every US Politician To Get PhD At Your Expense

Meme About Dumb PhD

I read an article about corruption in Russian higher education system. It is so corrupt it is funny. So I decided to share it with you, without adding any satire to it. It is so absurd that no satire has to be added to make it funny. So here is the excerpt from Slate Magazine:

Some of the intellectual theft Dissernet has identified is comic in its brazenness and absurdity.

Duma member Igor Igoshin allegedly earned his economics degree by turning someone else’s paper on the Russian chocolate industry into a thesis on meat; the dissertation replaced every mention of “chocolate” with “beef,” “dark chocolate” with “home-grown beef,” and “white chocolate” with “imported beef.” All numbers, charts, and analysis were preserved in their original form.

More recently, Dissernet revealed that an oncologist named Yuri Tsarapkin had handed in a medical article about breast cancer that was adapted—data and all—from someone else’s paper on stomach cancer. That paper, which was presented as a study of human subjects, turned out to have been plagiarized from yet another source: a study of cancer in dogs and rats.

Considering that the government officials of Russia and United States seem to be borrowing from each other all the worst, expect to see this wonderful corruption in the United States. Expect George W Bush to become a second president of the United States who is a professor of law. Expect the first president who is a professor of law to receive an honorary degree in war prevention. Expect Donald Trump to become a professor of ethnic relations. And oh yes, expect every member of the Republican party to get a PhD in social service help.

The future holds wonderfully honorable things for the political establishment of this country. They will all get PhD’s, and we will receive their education bills. Onward into the future with more and more PhD’s we don’t need. Onward into the future with great men who can neither write nor read but who can live like kings at our expense. Let’s give each of them a PhD. That will show the worth of every PhD.

Thank you for reading. That was yours truly Roman. Please comment unless you’re a PhD.

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Roman Marshanski
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