17 Best John Boehner Jokes

Check out this awesome collection of John Boehner Jokes. They include every comedian’s joke about him, as well as an occasional awesome joke from an everyday man. They are the best Internet has to offer.

Funny Photo-Jokes Featuring John Boehner

1. john boehner doesnt wanna go over fiscal cliff

2. john boehner and barack obamas funny talk about taxes

3. obama finds out john boehners secret

4. john boehners illusion of control - funny picture

5. john boehner tanning - funny meme

Comedian Jokes About John Boehner

6. “Well, it looks like John Boehner will be the new Speaker of the House. He is the son of a bartender, one of 12 children. He grew up in a two room home with just one bathroom, worked his way through school, became the first person in his family to graduate from college. And, sadly, fell in with the wrong crowd and wound up in Congress.” –Jay Leno

7. “This guy is an ad for Paxil.” —Bill Maher on John Boehner crying at a ceremony recognizing the 50th anniversary of John F. Kennedy’s inauguration

8. “The healthcare debate is getting ugly. Today, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and House Minority Leader John Boehner got into such a heated argument that Boehner missed his appointment at the tanning salon and Pelosi was late for Botox injections.” –Jay Leno

9. “John Boehner — doesn’t he look like every guy you’ve ever seen at a hotel bar? He looks like the kind of guy who licks his thumb when he counts his money.” –David Letterman

10. “Next week John Boehner will be sitting behind Barack Obama at the State of the Union address. I think Obama should purposely try to embarrass him by telling the story of ‘Old Yeller.’ The state of our Union is strong, but not so good for one special dog.'” —Bill Maher

11. “In his first speech as Speaker, Boehner thanked his loved ones – tobacco lobbyists, the oil companies, the CEOs.” –Jay Leno

12. “Speaker John Boehner complained that Barack Obama ordered the U.S. military into combat in Libya without clearly defining the mission to the American people and Congress. See, apparently, you’re only allowed to do that when invading Iraq.” —Jay Leno

13. “It is cold down in Washington, D.C. They had to use an ice scraper on John Boehner’s face to get the tears off, it was so cold.” —David Letterman

14. “John Boehner chose a huge gavel. I think somebody’s compensating for his small government.” –Stephen Colbert

15. “John Boehner will be the new speaker unless, out of habit, he blocks his own confirmation.” –Stephen Colbert

16. “You know who Boehner is, right? He’s that orange looking guy. See, for Republicans that counts as diversity.” –Jay Leno

17. “I: ‘Hey John Boehner! That poor bastard next to you is choking to death! Can’t you give him some help?’ John: ‘Sure! I’ll give him a tax cut!'” – Urban Dictionary

Want more funny stuff about John Boehner? Check out the facts about him from Politifact. You’d be surprised how many times he lied. Indeed, he must be either a pathological liar or a well-trained mouthpiece for corporate America.

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