One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agree with you. You do not change people’s minds.
If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.
The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it’s profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater.
Drop out of school before your mind rots from exposure to our mediocre educational system. Forget about the Senior Prom and go to the library and educate yourself if you’ve got any guts. Some of you like Pep rallies and plastic robots who tell you what to read.
Without deviation progress is not possible.
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced. Check out our awesome collection of Funny Lawyer Jokes
Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.
The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else’s life.
Information is not knowledge.
Knowledge is not wisdom.
Wisdom is not truth.
Truth is not beauty.
Beauty is not love.
Love is not music.
Music is THE BEST.
So many books, so little time.
Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.
A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment. Check out our awesome collection of Funny Political Jokes
Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.
Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.
I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Continue reading these Famous Frank Zappa Quotes
A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.
Most people wouldn’t know music if it came up and bit them on the ass.
Music is always a commentary on society.
A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.
The most important thing in art is The Frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively– because, without this humble appliance, you can’t know where The Art stops and The Real World begins. You have to put a ‘box’ around it because otherwise, what is that shit on the wall?
Anybody who wants religion is welcome to it, as far as I’m concerned–I support your right to enjoy it. However, I would appreciate it if you exhibited more respect for the rights of those people who do not wish to share your dogma, rapture, or necrodestination. Check out our awesome collection of Funny Religious Jokes
Communism doesn’t work because people like to own stuff.
All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
I searched for years I found no love. I’m sure that love will never be a product of plasticity.
Government is the Entertainment division of the military-industrial complex. Check out our awesome collection of really Funny Military Jokes
There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we’d all love one another.
Most rock journalism is people who can’t write, interviewing people who can’t talk, for people who can’t read.
No change in musical style will survive unless it is accompanied by a change in clothing style. Rock is to dress up to.
I think it’s really tragic when people get serious about stuff. It’s such an absurdity to take anything really seriously … I make an honest attempt not to take anything seriously: I worked that attitude out about the time I was eighteen, I mean, what does it all mean when you get right down to it, what’s the story here? Being alive is so weird.
The computer can’t tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what’s missing is the eyebrows.
You can’t always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.
The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents — because they have a tame child-creature in their house.
It isn’t necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice. There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.
Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something, uses that something to support their own existence.
lf you’re going to deal with reality, you’re going to have to make one big discovery: Reality is something that belongs to you as an individual. If you wanna grow up, which most people don’t, the thing to do is take responsibility for your own reality and deal with it on your own terms. Don’t expect that because you pay some money to somebody else or take a pledge or join a club or run down the street or wear a special bunch of clothes or play a certain sport or even drink Perrier water, it’s going to take care of everything for you.
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