1. “You killed a black astronaut, Cyril! That’s like killing a unicorn!”
2. (Explaining to Cyborg Katya what she is feeling as he comforts her) “Sorry, that’s just a, uh, sympathy boner.”
3. “Danger zone!”
5. Archer: “Oh my God! You killed a hooker!” Cyril: “Call girl! She was a…” Archer: “No Cyril, when they’re dead, they’re just hookers!”
6. “Idiots doing idiot things, because they’re idiots."
7. “Power blackout."
8. Archer Quotes – Phrasing Compilation
9. “I’m scared if I stop all at once, the cumulative hangover will literally kill me.”
10. “I’m not saying I invented the turtleneck, but I was the first person to realise its potential as a tactical garment. The tactical turtleneck! The… tactleneck.”
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11. (On meeting his hero Burt Reynolds) “I can’t hear you over the sound of my giant, throbbing erection!”
12. “Those cannot be your only shoes. What am I saying? It’s Russia. People probably come from miles around just to get their picture taken in those.”
13. (As he throws all of Woodhouse’s shoes off the balcony) “Because I told you to buy lemon curd, Woodhouse. Now what am I going to spread on my toast? Your tears?”
14. (On why he’s so scared of crocodiles) “Gee, I don’t know. Maybe deep down I’m afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it’s the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.”
15. “For I am a sinner in the hands of an angry God. Bloody Mary, full of vodka, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now and at the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen.”
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