1. Waitress: Plate or platter?
Lucille: I don’t understand the question and I won’t respond to it.
2. Michael: Tell me the truth. There’s been a lot of lying in this family
Lucille: And a lot of love.
Michael: More lies.
3. Gob: [talking about his new boat] The Seaward.
Michael: You’re not getting a boat.
Gob: [doing rock, paper, scissors] One, two, three.
Michael: You’re not gonna do it…
Gob: Paper covers rock.
Michael: Fine, but rock sinks boat.
Lucille: [entering room] Michael.
Michael: Just a minute mom.
Michael: . Get rid of the Seaward.
Lucille: I’ll leave when I’m good and ready.
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4. [Lucille replaces Lupe with a robot vacuum cleaner, then catches Buster in bed with it]
Buster: Well, what do you expect, mother?
[holds up his hook]
Buster: I’m half machine. I’m a monster.
5. Lucille: You tricked me.
Michael: I *deceived* you. “Tricked” makes it sound like we have a playful relationship.
6. Michael Bluth: [calling from prison, talking about his brother, Gob] I’ve got a nice hard cot with his name on it.
Lucille: You would do that to your brother?
Michael Bluth: I said “cot”.
7. Narrator: For the first time, Lucille prays…
Lucille: [Praying] Take something else from us. Do whatever you have to to keep my boy from going to war.
Narrator: And Buster is on his way when he decides to pursue a long-delayed rite of passage…
[Buster swims in the ocean]
Person: Loose seal. Watch out for loose seal.
Buster: [Thinking he means Lucille] I don’t care about Lucille. She lies.
Narrator: …and then a seal bites off his hand.
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